Who's driving your bus?

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission”

Everyone wants to be happy and enjoy their life; however most of us rely on happiness from outside. We tend to blame the outside situations and other people for why our life is so miserable. Why is it the way it is?  If we take responsibility for what is happening in our life, then everything changes over night. When we rely on external events and other people we give our power away to someone else or some events.  Then if it doesn’t go according to how we want it we then blame others as well.  The question is who’s driving your bus?  

You may ask me so how about those who intentionally hurt me, how about those rapists, murderers and all others who commit crimes against humanity.  I’m not denying these things are not happening. These challenges are going to be always there around you. However, when you realise consciously or unconsciously you’re responsible for your life you will stop blaming others and start looking within yourself for solutions. It is not to beat yourselves up or anything, but to get your power back. Realising I’m responsible for everything happening to me and around me gives the power. 

Some of my client’s and friends say that they already know all these and it didn’t work for them. So I usually catch them when they react to things or behave in a certain way, some people don’t like it and they feel confronted and some people just laugh at themselves for doing what they did and correct themselves.  When they react, it shows that they are not practicing what they’ve learnt, and it was just something that they learnt and it is just there as an old file in their memory. Some people think they know it and they have done it all but they don’t really apply it in their life or practice it, which shows that you don’t really know it.

I allowed myself to be used, and/or I allowed myself to be in a certain situation in my life that created lots of problem in my life. I choose to be there either consciously or unconsciously. I knew this theoretically for a long time; however when I really started living this way my whole life changed. There’s only happiness and bliss.  Some people even ask me if I’m drunk when I’m out or in a party when I haven’t even touched any alcohol or anything. I just laugh even more, and some of my friends even say you had enough, you have to drive, so drink some water now... hahaha.

You may ask me, don’t you react? Don’t you get angry? Don’t you feel this or that...? I don’t like to give my power to anyone to control my life. I don’t allow anyone else to decide how I should be feeling. Sometimes, I may have some sudden reactions; however it only last for few minutes or seconds.  It used to ruin my life for days or/and even weeks before. Certain things happened in my life ruined my daily life for years. Nowadays I don’t give the privilege to anyone to make me feel angry or sad or anything less than what I am.  That came with awareness of who I am and lots of practices.

Do you know that you can choose your own thoughts, reactions and emotions to pretty much everything? You don’t have to freak out, overreact or even react in a negative way. Perhaps not every time or instantly especially at the beginning when you start practicing this. Sometimes a knee-jerk reaction just goes off, or an old thought habit kicks in, but you’ll realise it and only last for few minutes or seconds and you’re back to taking responsibility for the way that you feel and behave towards any situations and life challenges.

As you realize that nobody outside of yourself can actually control how you feel you can start to incorporate this into your daily life and develop it as a habit. Thoughts become your behaviour and when you do it few times it becomes your habit and then it becomes your second nature. 

Aristotle says “we are what we repeatedly do, excellence, then not an act but a habit”.  When you learn to manage yourself in every possible way, it becomes easier for you to create the excellence in whatever area that you want.